A Starr Is Born

Once upon a time, I knew a kid named Nathan Starr (first name isn't really his name, but his last name is. I just used it for the title of this post). We met while we were taking the driver's ed classroom portion. He seemed pretty normal at first, & was the nicest person in that class full of delinquents. We even ended up in the same car for the driving portion of the class! Isn't that convenient? I thought I had finally made a friend.

Obviously, since I'm writing about it on here, it either ends up being really weird or really depressing. This story is the former.

As far as he told me, he lived in an emotionally abusive household. According to him, he was a crack baby, which explains a lot of his future behavior. Eventually, his father remarried & his half-sister took most of the attention. His step-mom would go days without speaking to him over the slightest infraction. Because of this, I felt really bad for him. But then he started talking about how he worked out all of the time. Well, that's all well & good. But he also started talking about how he had so much power that he could force doors to close without touching them. That is not well & good at all. He also said he slept with an ax under his pillow for protection.

Yep.

Eventually we met at the mall to hang out for the first time since we took driver's ed. Pretty much the whole time was spent with him acting really weird, trying to embarrass me in front of a girl I liked at the time, & just being a creeper. At one point, I tried to lose him but wasn't successful.

Also, it should be noted that all of the working out that he did? He flexed & showed me his abs (in public....) & they didn't look like jack. He also said he had been growing a beard but it was barely a mustache. It really made me nervous that his reality was something completely different than the correct reality (i.e. my reality).

After a while, I told him over the phone that I didn't want to be his friend anymore because he freaked me out. And we didn't talk for a while. But then we started talking again for some reason & met to hang out at this park. He brought his motorbike that he had just fixed & some black kid with tattoos I later found out stood for the Bloods (Rocky Mount is full of gang activity) asked if he could ride it. I was thinking to myself, "This is beyond stupid. There's no way he will let this kid ride his motorbike." But sure enough, Nathan let him ride the bike. And just as expected, homeslice rode off & never came back. Nathan chased after him on foot (I ran a little but didn't expend too much energy because there's no way in hell we are catching someone on a motorbike) but the cause was lost. And so was the bike.

That was the last time I saw Nathan. We spoke some over Myspace a little later but I have no idea what he's up to nowadays.

Another Guest Post

Remember when I had Aubree do that guest post, & then I did a guest post on her blog? Well I also had reader/Facebook friend Caleb do one as well. Granted, it's taken me about a month to post this because daddy's been busy, but never late than never. Take it away, Caleb!

"Recently I’ve been reading about people who get themselves in all sorts of F’ed up situations because they’re trying to be “nice.” (This means you, Andrew) I have an aversion to the term “nice,” but I’m not going to get into that here. Instead, I’m going focus on the part of “nice” where you hear what someone is saying through the filter of best intentions. It’s time for a post about “Creepy people translation.”

To make sure we’re on the same page I’m going to start out with an easy one. Picture, if you will, an old guy in a van leaning out the window to offer you free candy if you’ll just hop inside with him. He is probably down to a handful of teeth, wearing a ragged hat, and perhaps overalls with no shirt underneath.

He says “I will give you some free candy if you come over here to the inside of my van!”

You think “Hmm… he probably has a driver’s license, so he’s safe. And I DO like candy…”

He means “I need a lampshade and your skin looks conducive to light.”

Obviously this isn’t a good idea, right? Is it “nice” of you to not go to his van? Probably not. So f*ck “nice.”

Next up: you’re a girl, on a dating site, and a guy has just “winked” at you and sent you a message. He has a picture of himself with his shirt off, backwards hat, and glasses. Essentially his message is “hey gurl u so fiiine- lets hook up soon.” You brush this one off, but he keeps sending more all the time (cuz he’s a creeper). Eventually, you may decide to take him up. Here’s the translation:

He says ”I find you attractive and we should meet.”

You think ”Gosh, maybe I’m being close-minded. He might be a decent guy and I’m not giving him a shot. Plus, maybe he’s kind of cute in real life.”

He means “I’m trying to bang 50 hoes this week and you look like a great #46. I will wear you down over time and then roofie you into my bed. PS see my sweet shades?”

If any part of you thinks that this guy isn’t a weirdo who will harass you incessantly, I know a prince in Jordan who is trying to get a few million gold bars out of the country.

Next: you’re working somewhere and a customer is spending a lot of time talking to you. They’re asking personal questions, they’re kind of [older, weird looking, homeless-y, etc.] and you’re not quite comfortable. Inevitably they ask for your contact info. You consider giving it to them. Tranlation:

They say “I’m really interested in you as a unique person! You should tell me more about yourself, then give me your number and facebook info so that we can continue this fascinating discussion.”

You think “They seem… nice. It doesn’t hurt to talk to them I guess. I’ll just give them my Facebook stuff and not accept their friend request. I don’t want to tell them to bug off cuz that might be mean.

They mean: “I’m going to keep asking you crap about yourself to keep you talking long enough that you’ll give me your information. Then, I’m probably going to stalk you. Maybe I’ll get to take you out to the back of my car, but at the least I’ll be able to text-bomb you for weeks or even months!”

Hopefully you’re starting to see a pattern here. If not, I have one last counter-example for you, and maybe it will help illustrate things:

You’re a small child in the cold of winter. A large man in an oversized outfit and a long beard is beckoning for you to sit on his lap and confess your desires. Your parents urge you forward.

He says “Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas! Come sit on my lap and tell me what you want this year!”

You think “Hmm… mom said to avoid strangers, but he seems pretty cool. And merry.”

He means “I’m getting $100 bucks to be cheerful and listen to you snot nosed punks tell me of your greed. Hurry up.”

This situation? Totally okay. Seriously- Santa is good shit.

Well I hope this helped clear a few things up for you folks. If I can keep even one person from getting into a trucker’s cab after working at the theater all night, I’ll have done my job.

Thanks Andrew!"

You're welcome, Caleb.

My Own Guest Post

So, I did a guest post on Aubree's blog. It's the typical fare: I get into a weird situation with a creeper that could potentially end with me losing my innocence &/or life. This one involves the movie theater & a truck driver.

Enjoy!

Guest Post! Holla!

So I decided to do my first ever guest post today! This is due partly because I don't feel like posting my own shit, but also because I want people to read the awesomeness that is Aubree, who hails all the way from Inspirational Me. You should follow her. But not in a creepy way.

Anyway, here is her post.

"Back last year when I was in a fit of annoyance over my demanding 16 unit school schedule, having to go to work and my complete lack of a social or dating life, someone from work suggested an online dating site (it was free, of course).

I'll pause for your laughter. Done? Okay, moving on.

Apparently she had 'tons of success!!' on there and got a few relationships out of it so I checked it out, mostly just to see how it worked. I filled out some questionnaires but never posted a picture, so naturally no responses came. Then, a few months ago, I remembered I had an account on there and put up a picture.

Some guy who lives pretty near me continuously contacted me and when he asked for my number, I didn't know how to say no. No matter how many times my response was "Lol" he always found something to reply to and wouldn't leave me alone. I tried to make him lose interest by being unfunny and boring, but to no avail. After not even knowing me for a week, he wanted to meet up.

I didn't really want to go, but since I have no spine and he seemed nice enough, I tentatively agreed. He asked where I live and, not being a total ass hat, I gave him a city near where I live. We were supposed to meet up at the entrance to this big shopping center near where I told him I live (it was actually pretty far from my house). I even told him I had work that night (I did not) so I'd have an excuse to bounce in case it sucked.

I felt really weird about going and things just seemed sketchy, like him telling me to lie to my parents about who I was hanging out with. After canceling and uncanceling a few times, I told him I was definitely canceling. I don't even know why he still wanted to meet up since I was being so hesitant and back and forth about it all! He tried a few times to get me to reconsider (am I really that charming and beautiful?) but I further declined.

I have since disabled my account and even though myself and potential killer are still friends on Facebook, we haven't talked since a few days after I bailed.

Oh, and Julie looked at all of his pictures on Facebook (I stupidly only looked at a few of them) and I guess he is big into comics and Star Wars and has pictures of himself at a convention where he shaved his head and painted it black and red like Darth Maul and glued horns on his head.

Crisis averted."