My Ailment

Got my test results back (only because I got sick of waiting & called them myself). It turns out I'm low on Vitamin D, so I got a supplement for it. We'll see what happens.

I've been feeling really crappy lately, so I forced myself to go hiking with Madison yesterday. The trail we were supposed to take was supposed to only be 4 miles (meh) but ended up almost being 6 miles. Other than being out of breath for a little bit of it, I did really well & had a good time. I used to love hiking & exploring in the woods at my grandma's house when I was younger, & then again when I lived in Georgia. Maybe I've finally found a hobby after 25 years.

The phone I got in April is broken. Again. New phone is on its way, which means it's the 6th phone I've had in 2 years. Screw you, Verizon.

A lot has been happening, most of which I can't post about on here (yet). But along with my birthday story, I've got another one coming up.

Doctor Time

I think I'm going to make an appointment to see the doctor while I still have insurance (my mom can retire in February, plus I'm getting old). I'm not necessarily sick, but something just feels off. Well, more off than usual.

Aside from my usual anxiety & depression crap, I'm just exhausted all the time. At this point I'm struggling to get my homework done because just thinking about starting it wears me out & I then I find myself taking a 5 hour nap. I'm getting it done, but I'm stressed out the whole time because I dicked around all week because I was napping or watching TV because I was stressed out.

My room is a mess right now because I start thinking about how I need to clean it & then I start to worry about where I'm going to put it. Then I get tired & just give up. There are two piles of books on either side of my bed. They've been there for weeks & I have no idea what to do with them.

Riveting stuff.

Kill me.

I have no energy to read much for pleasure. It takes too much effort. Even watching TV or getting on the internet takes too much energy.

I had been worried I was overwhelmingly lazy, but my counselor doesn't think it's that. He suggested that I might as well get it figured out while I still have insurance, in case it's something more serious than we think.

And just so everyone knows, if I start thinking about exercising that almost does me in. I've had a yoga mat for almost a month that I haven't even unrolled. I don't think it's my diet either, because I eat quite a bit of fruits, veggies, & grains.

I'm not really concerned. Just pissed off more than anything.

That Time My Lungs Were Destroyed For A Little Over Minimum Wage

I've tried to make it a habit recently not to talk about work anymore since I was reprimanded for saying something negative about a product on Facebook in October. The company has taken the stance that any negative talk about a policy, product, customer, or employee will result in termination. But honestly, today was such bull that I can't help it.

Our district manager is a Dingleberry (I've nicknamed him that, too). He is under the impression that everything should be cleaned all the time & we should never stop moving. This on top of the fact that we don't get breaks (illegal!). So he was there today, spreading his charm, & we kept getting cleaning assignments. I got stuck deck brushing all of the tile floor (a huge undertaking) & eventually ended up hurting my back & shoulders, as well as inhaling a copious amount of 409. I went to the back later & was given a new assignment: cleaning the mop bucket. Yes.

I was instructed to spray the 409 onto the mop bucket, take a scrubby sponge, & clean the mop bucket. In all fairness, it was disgusting, but seriously. It's a mop bucket. People expect disgusting from it. So I'm stuck in the back, sitting on the floor, wearing those yellow dish gloves. There is no ventilation back there & we aren't allowed to open any of the doors back there, so the 409 was really starting to get to me. On top of all of that, my OCD was kicking in & I never wanted to stop. It would never be clean enough. Ever. EVER!

Eventually my shift supervisor commanded that I stop because she was worried about my health, seeing as my face was apparently starting to turn a funny color due to the chemicals. As soon as Dingleberry left, my manager & I loosened up & we started inventing drinks & having fun. We continued to clean some, but the urgency dissipated.

I am the World's Most Unhappy Barista.

P.S. I already have had a hard time getting rid of the cough from my sickness a few weeks ago but it's been ridiculous today. Just constant hacking, gagging, dry heaving.

So Hardcore

The badass Spongebob thermometer. And my bloodshot eyes. Which (fortunately or unfortunately) aren't from narcotics.

It even plays the theme music. Cool, eh?

The Time I Thought I Was Going To Die Last Night

Overall, I like to pride myself on a pretty stellar immune system. I only get sick once a year at the most, but unfortunately when I do it's a doozy.

Earlier this week I began to notice I was coughing a little bit more. I had a bad feeling of what was coming because everyone & their mother (& my own mother) has been sick recently. When I was moving last weekend I accidently kissed my mom on the lips (no incest) when I forgot she was getting over something nasty. As soon as it happened, I realized I had made a mistake. And no, that mistake was not linked to kissing my mother on the mouth. That's how we show our love.

Anyway. I began coughing a lot more on Wednesday & by Thursday morning when I got up for work, I knew what my fate would be. I had begun feeling tingly. Achy. I always feel that at the onset of sick. Luckily my shift was short & I slept almost all afternoon. But when I woke up....oy.

I didn't feel horrendous at first but as the evening wore on I wanted to be cradled by the sweet embrace of death. On the plus side, I got to watch "Community." On the negative side, I was sick. Katie came over with soup & orange juice. She tried to concoct a ginger tea for me out of ginger powder & water but luckily she realized how bad it would be & I never had to try it. I was starting to sweat like crazy & shake a little bit, & eventually she left so I could suffer alone. And suffer I did.

My heart was pounding so hard & so fast that I seriously thought I might be dying. I would consider calling 911 but since my phone doesn't let me call anyone (thanks again, Verizon!) I just laid on the couch. Then I slept in the bathroom. Then I went back to the couch. Then back to the bathroom. Then to my room where I woke up a ton but luckily I slept relatively well, give or take my pounding heart.

I felt fine upon waking up this afternoon but I can tell as the day wears on that I'm going to start feeling worse. Katie brought me those Halls Vitamin C drops, Day & Nyquil, some cookies, & a Spongebob thermometer. My fever may have broken but I'm starting to feel bad again.

Oh yeah, my roommate's girlfriend is coming to visit this weekend & he's also having a party. This should be fun.

Eventually, I will talk about my move.