It was funny, because even back then you can tell that I'm going to end up being...ahem...different. I COULD NOT color anything the way it was supposed to be. Cats were green, dogs were purple, Adam & Eve were the same color as the Jolly Green Giant, Santa's outfit was blue. I've always just marched to the beat of my own drum.
And a lot of times, even back then, that drum was marching at a lazy/unmotivated beat. You can tell which masterpieces I cared about (probably depending where I did them) based on the attention to detail. You can just look at certain pages & tell I'm irritated because I don't want to be coloring it. (The main thing I'm thinking of it a coloring book of the Nativity Story. I only used a purple crayon, & all I did was scribble a few lines in the middle of the pages. One page I skipped entirely.)
That's somewhat how I am now. I feel so unmotivated by the monotony of life & unstimulated by the requirements of living. If I don't like doing something, more than likely I will half-ass it. I will still get high marks (generally an A or an A+) but I just don't care. No one can say I've ever been stupid (slow on the uptake, perhaps. But not stupid). My mom said she taught me to count to 200 by the time I was 2 & when I was 5 I had a 5th grade vocabulary. When I was 10 I had a college-age reading level. I just....don't care about a lot of things. Apathy.
I want to care about something. I want a hobby, an interest, something that I'm passionate about. Hopefully in my new pursuit at being the best Andrew Nelms I can be, I will find that missing spark.
Or I'll half-ass my way through that, too.
