Sunday, September 21, 2014

Mr. Bailey

Well, I'm still going to community college.

That in & of itself has provided numerous ridiculous situations, but none of them have fully encapsulated the community college "experience" as one student in particular who is in my Trace Evidence class. On the first day of class this semester, he strolled into the classroom late, which is his M.O. every day. My instructor didn't use his first name, & only referred to him as "Mr. Bailey." Well, Mr. Bailey, a young man around my age, sat in front of me to the right, & multiple times throughout the period he would fling his arms back to stretch & almost hit me in the head; it was then that I noticed each & every one of his fingernails was about half an inch longer than the tip of his finger. During this first class, Mr. Bailey would interrupt the instructor to ask questions that didn't really pertain to the subject matter (in this case, since it was the first day of class, the syllabus). At one point he asked how many credits he needed to shoot a gun.

Oh.

Over the next few weeks I learned quite a few things about Mr. Bailey, such as the fact that he procreated, wouldn't participate in group lab assignments due to being in a fugue state & wandering all over the classroom, & that he enjoyed coming to class high as a kite (this last one I learned the hard way, when I realized I had a contact high while sitting about 7 feet away from him).

But Mr. Bailey's finest moment came this past Thursday, on September 18, 2014. While it was a ridiculous day in many other instances (which may or may not garner a post of their own), the highlight was definitely courtesy of Mr. Bailey. We were doing a lab where we split into groups & tried to match hairs under a microscope. Since this required participation, Mr. Bailey wandered around the classroom, picking up random objects. On the other side of the room from where I was is a pulley that activates a decontamination shower, since this is a science lab. At one point I look over to where Mr. Bailey was & saw him walk right up to the lever, pull it, & release the water on himself. At first I just stared in shock, then turned around to look at the older gentleman who sits by me; he just stared back at me.

Then there was total silence from everyone.

Then laughter.

Then our instructor, a former homicide detective, yelled, "MR. BAILEY! FIRST OF ALL, PULL UP YOUR DAMN PANTS! SECOND, CLEAN UP THIS MESS! GRAB SOME PAPER TOWELS & CLEAN THIS UP! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

Mr. Bailey was so shocked/embarrassed that he couldn't talk & instead of going for the paper towels he tried to use a roll of paper (I actually felt bad for him about that). As he was leaving the room our instructor said, "Folks, this is why you don't do drugs."

And that's the moral of the story.

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Just A Few Things

Today at work sucked. I came in & things were in total disarray. Tons of customers & things were just a mess. Plus, customers were pretty rude most of the night. But by the end of it my co-workers & I had gotten into a pretty decent groove & left about 15 minutes earlier than what the norm is.

Something that happened near the beginning of my shift though was my old manager coming by to pick some stuff up. I miss him so much. I miss my old store. I think in the longterm my transfer was a good move but right now I just miss how things used to be.

Also, closer to the end of the night, my old landlord came by. Definitely didn't need that at all. It just made me sad that I was basically forced out of his house, which was so reasonably priced & centrally located, & now live back with my parents an hour away. But I'm not bitter. Not at all.

On another note, school is going well. My former co-worker finally talked to me & I'm settling in nicely with my professors it seems. I did find out that one of them uses crime scene photos from local murders so I need to ask if any are of my aunt's murder. Because while I think I'd be ok reading a report on it, I think I'd be ok if I never had to see any photos of her dead. But that just may be me.

Well, I think I'm off to sleep. I'm working at another store tomorrow night so I need to be well-rested to show those honey boo boo's how it's done.

Peace.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

First Day

Today was my first day of class. For the first time in about 3 1/2 years, I had to actually sit in a classroom rather than try to stay engaged in an online setting. To be honest, I quite enjoyed it. One of the worst aspects of doing my Master's online was how disengaged it all was. While we had discussion boards that would force us to interact, there's only so much that will accomplish. Plus, it helps having the professor right there in front of you. Also I hated the thought of having my name associated with the cesspool that is Liberty University.

The first class that I took was Ethics & Community Relations. That's going to be about as exciting as an Ethics class will ever be. My night class was Constitutional Law. Again....about as exciting as a class about the constitution is going to be. But my afternoon class, the one I've been looking forward to the most: crime scene processing. We didn't do jack shit today but I'm so excited. There's also a lady in there named Queennez & I can't wait to learn more about her.

On a weirder note, there's a girl in that class that I knew as a teenager. We worked together at the movie theater & have been Facebook friends for a while; we've even been in communication since I enrolled in the program because I knew she was also in it. Guess what. Didn't even acknowledge me (not that I said anything to her but she's the more senior individual here. She should be taking me under her wing). Whatevs.

On a sentimental note, it's weird being back on that campus. When I stopped home schooling & went to the alternative high school, it was on that campus. I then took 2 years worth of classes there before transferring to Toccoa. So much of the campus has changed but in other ways it's still the same shit hole I remember. Some of the faces are familiar (professors, librarians, & janitors), but overall it's totally different. And I'm not some 17-19 year old kid anymore. Now I'm a 27 year old man-child living with his parents & commuting an hour to work at a damn coffee shop/bageleria. I've lived in 2 other states, graduated college, almost graduated graduate school, lost 2 grandparents, & lived with a roommate who filmed gay bondage porn in our basement. In some ways I feel like I've made several steps back by returning to community college but since the crime scene investigation field is one I'm actually interested in, this will hopefully be several more steps in the right direction.

Monday, January 6, 2014

Well Hi There

It's been a while, hasn't it? I thought I was done with this particular blog until I started listening to some of the music I listened to when I wrote regularly & memories started coming back. I just typed in "blogspot" in my browser & it immediately logged me in my account. Hey there, technology.

So what's been going on? Well, I'll tell you about my mess. I found a new roommate (or 2) & they were a hot mess. One constantly left the doors unlocked & was one of the most selfish people I've ever met. The other was a bully. We ended up getting broken into on New Years Eve last year (I would have been home alone had I not picked up a shift at work). The selfish one moved out & another guy moved in. He & my other roommate were like 2 peas in a fucking pod & I overheard them discussing trying to get one of their girlfriend's to move in. The only way that would be possible is if someone moved out (it obviously wouldn't be either of them). I took it upon myself to start looking for places that eventually all fell through. Unfortunately I had already told them I was planning on moving so the wheels had been set in motion. I ended up running out of time & had to move back in with my parents an hour away from work (& Raleigh, obviously). I was picked to help open a new coffee shop in Kansas City for 2 weeks around this time. And then I was asked to transfer to a new store that was trying out a new business model. That's where I am now. Commuting an hour both ways to work at a coffee shop while I live with my parents.

On the education front, I tried going back to grad school but the counseling field just isn't for me. While I might be a good listener & supportive of people in real life, I genuinely believe that being a counselor isn't my calling. Back in November I went by the local community college to get info on their Criminal Justice program & it happened to be the first day of spring registration. I took it as a sign that my calling was to be a CSI (I've been interested in that field since I was a teenager). So starting next week I'll be regressing from a Master's program to an Associate's program to find my vocational fulfillment. Whatever.

So there's that. We'll see when I update again.