Tuesday, May 25, 2010


There's so much uncertainty in my life right now. Ohmuhgosh you guys! The jury is still out on whether or not I'm going to be fired. According to Dixie (classmate & co-worker) I don't have anything to worry about as far as what happened last weekend is concerned. However, the guy I replaced was told he had nothing to worry about. No matter what I do, I'm wrong. When I ask a question I'm treated like I'm stupid. If a client asks me something, whatever my course of action (letting them do something or not, answering their question, doing something for them) is wrong. Always.

The clients don't take me seriously as an authority figure. Whenever I try to get them to do something they either try to manipulate me, ignore me, or flat-out tell me they aren't gonna do it. I used to try to reason with them but it's just not worth it anymore. Now I tell them what I need them to do, I let them tell me what they're actually going to do, & then I say, "OK" & walk off.

One of the clients I got along really well with (an older guy who left yesterday. Of course) told me that a supervisor was talking to him about how unobservant I am (so professional) so the client was trying to help me. I told him I'm actually quite observant but I've basically given up because it doesn't seem to matter.

Now, you might be thinking, "Andrew, you can turn this around. You don't know they're going to fire you" & you might very well be correct. However, I saw this weekend on the calender on the desk of the guy who hired me (& now tells clients I am unobservant) that he had an interview with a guy scheduled for today. And they always do this: hire a replacement of the same gender before they get rid of their intended victim. My parents & a few others think I should go ahead & quit so I don't get fired, but I'm afraid I'm jumping the gun & who knows how long it will take me to find another job.

I feel like someone who knows they're about to get voted off on "Survivor." Like a screwed sitting duck.


Rebecca J-G said...

Oh Andrew, my heart hurts for you. I'm kind of on the fence in this situation, but I'm leaning toward agreeing with the folks. It might be best to 'get out while the gettin's good' rather than hang around and suffer the indignity of being fired. That being said, you know that you have a tendency to think the worst of things, so it may not be as bad as you imagine. However, being proactive and looking for another job would give you the advantage.

I said before, you need a job that doesn't require you to bleed every day just to exist on the payroll. You need a job that you can do naturally without enormous amounts of stress (don't we all?) You haven't really settled in at this job anyway....

Have you thought about looking on Craigslist? I actually found my job there almost 2 years ago, and it is a STATE job with DHHS. Surprisingly enough it feels 'natural' (I teach workshops) it is part-time and pays well (per diem and mileage, meals etc) and once I got the material for the workshop down...I just do it over and over at different sites. No biggie, but it pays! It took away the stress of being a professor and gave me the flexibility I needed to be home more hours. Who would have thought that DHHS would post on Craigslist?

Of course, I checked out the person who responded to my inquiry before I committed to meet her. I wanted to be sure it was a 'real' posting and not some weirdo. Actually found my future boss' FB page. (And I told her I checked her out online when I went to the interview. She was a bit taken aback, but I wanted her to know that I wasn't coming into the situation blind...)
Check craigslist. Seriously. Get proactive and don't just stand there waiting for something to happen TO you..take initiative.

I'm going to be praying about this and keeping it in the forefront of God's ears. He listens to me... I know He does, so the prayers will help. You do your part and start checking around. Don't let life happen to you...attack it!
Thinking of you and wishing you well! You are going to come out on top of this, you just need to come up for air, take another deep breath and dive in!

Andrew said...

I am currently on Craigslist giving it a gander. Who knows what'll happen with it. Lol!

I know I have a flair for the dramatic & negative, so that's why I'm so hesitant to actually quit, ya know?

On top of all this crap, I'm about to have a meltdown about school & other life mess that I'm going to post about later today if I get a chance. Hopefully I'll have a funny story to talk about soon so it's not all just me bitching on here.

Rebecca J-G said...

Did you see the part time Job coordinator in West Palm Beach? It's working with homeless people finding them jobs...it's a Christian nonprofit place. Hey, maybe THEY could help you find a job! Just joshing ya....

Andrew said...

Hehe! I did apply for that position. And another one. I'm not able to set up a computer-based e-mail address so I just copied the Craigslist e-mail & sent it from my personal address. They haven't been sent back yet so I'm assuming that works. LoL!

Rebecca J-G said...

That's wonderful Andrew! I actually thought the one working with the homeless sounded like something you could do....I used my personal email too when I applied for my job. I also included my phone number. Did you send you resume and everything or just initiate contact?
I hope something happens soon. Be sure to let me know!

Andrew said...

I sent a cover letter in the body of the e-mail & attached my banging resume. I also applied for another job working as a therapist & another for a Human Resources position.

Rebecca J-G said...

Ok, I'm feeling good about this...you should too! You've taken some positive action and become totally proactive in your life! GO ANDREW!! *waves pompoms and jumps in the air*